I am making the transition (kicking and screaming) to a new web format.  Therefore, I won’t be updating the blog for a few more weeks.  I appreciate all your encouragement to keep writing.  I’ll be back soon.

Look for some changes to the Hodi Center website and more regular updates on our events and workshops in the coming weeks.

Sincerely,

Nicole Eull, PsyD

Tat Pratisedhartham eka tattva bhyasah

“The practice of concentration on a single subject [or the use of one technique] is the best way to prevent the obstacles and their accompaniments.”

Sri Swami Satchidananda translates this text and states….
“When you decide on one thing, stick to it whatever happens.  There’s no value in digging shallow wells in a hundred places.”

Oh this passage is highlighted, underlined, and dog-eared in my copy of the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. They may as well have put arrows in the text and said “Yo!  Nicole!  This part is for you honey.”

I often make fun of my husband because he loves trivia.  The man can remember the most obscure facts.  He remembers actors’ names, sports statistics, and chemical formulas.  He absolutely cannot resist looking up the answer to a question once it’s out there and he consumes magazines, newspaper’s and books.

The truth is that I am the same way.  Although the focus of my attention is on different topics, I am always reading about 3-4 things at the same time.  I have books and resources scattered all over my home.  I am half way through various wonderful intellectual pursuits.  I am very excited and passionate about many things but being centered and truly devoting my complete potential to one thing is extremely difficult.

I know many of you can relate.  The funny thing is that we often think we are victims of our fast-paced lives or the information super highway.  This may make it easier to indulge in an informational or experiential buffet but Patanjali was writing about this part of human nature hundreds of years ago.

Patanjali offers meditation as a method for increasing focus and training the mind to rest fully with one thought or pursuit.  To allow all the restlessness, fear, boredom, and self-doubt to play out and then dissipate.  What is left is our true nature.  This insight, even if disturbing, provides a clearer vision of what is really missing and, more importantly, what is already there.  What is already perfect and powerful about us.

When you begin a meditation practice, many doubts will likely appear.  I often find myself waiting to see what will happen or I’m thinking about the spiritual “pay off” instead of observing the present moment.  The only way to move through this and to enjoy the stillness that meditation offers is to continue to meditate.  Even using the same technique over and over again for many weeks or months.

One of my past yoga teachers is from Jamaica.  She often told the story of her guru instructing her to meditate on a mango every morning for a month.  She sat and stared at that mango for 30 minutes every day.  She struggled and wiggled and felt ridiculous.  Then one day her mind ran out of distractions.  She saw the mango as an expression of the perfection of nature and felt a deeper connection with herself.  She also felt a sharper sense of what it meant to be truly present in one moment.

That ability to be fully present can help us to work on tasks with our fullest attention and talent.  This is the kind of freedom that great (or not so great) artists feel when creating.  We can use this energy to create a masterpiece of our own lives.

For now I continue to struggle with my meditations.  I sometimes just want to eat the mango (so to speak).  I sometimes think that maybe an apple would be more appropriate or maybe a banana.  Just this awareness of my restlessness is the beginning of the mindfulness that meditation brings.

Pantanjali encourages us to keep digging.  Dedicate yourself to the practice and move through the obstacles to your fullest potential.

I was happily decking my halls on Wednesday…  Lights on tree.  Check.  Garland on banister.  Check.  Ribbons on garland…better go get those.  And that’s when I go down…slithering down the stairs toward my foyer in full hurdle position – one leg out front and one behind.   I let out a small noise of surprise as I slip toward the bottom.  The boys hear this only, my fall must have been exceedingly quiet, and call out, “Mom, are you okay?”  Well, I just fell down the stairs.  They thoughtfully put their movie on hold and come to check on me.  “Would you like us to help you up.” 

 As I sat at the bottom of the stairs laughing and thinking of how ridiculous it must have looked, I thought, “Thank God I do yoga.  Thank God I did yoga this morning!”

 I am miraculously unharmed except for one small bruise on my right knee and a mildly sore muscle in my shoulder because my arm stayed behind me as I reached for the railing.  Yoga, more than a state of mind.

Barbara Kingslover

Animal, Vegetable, Miracle

A recent study showed that hypnosis is as effective as standard therapy for people who want to stop smoking.

I have had some great success in helping people meet their goal to stop smoking through hypnosis.  My first suggestion though is to make sure you are ready.  Make sure that you really want to stop and that you are not seeking help to please someone else.  Forget ideas of people clucking like chickens and generally embarrassing themselves.  Hypnosis only works if you are really ready to change.  It cannot make you do things you do not want to do. 

Think about whether you are ready to be healthier, happier, and more energetic.  Stop smoking now!  All the cool kids are smoke-free.  Get on board.

OnMilwaukee.com Milwaukee Buzz: Dont hang up that bike yet. Were going World Class.

I DON”T BAKE BREAD!

I am actually ashamed of this fact.  I love the idea of rising dough.  I love the idea of kneading and baking with ancient recipes and whole grains and seeds.  But ideas, my friend, are one thing and reality is quite another. 

I have tried to do it.  I have tried all the recipes that make it sound so easy.  What I have discovered, as that now famous book says, is that I am just not that into it.  I have also discovered that I don’t like to prepare to eat bread more than 24 hours ahead of time. 

If you read my blog regularly, you will note that I was reading Michael Pollan’s book, Food Matters, a few months ago and that he had inspired me to try again.  I gave it a go.  I subjected my husband to passable loves of bread that he had to cut every morning to make his toast and then clean up the crumbs (or not) that fell all over the counter.  I got annoyed at keeping up with buying the ingredients, making the bread and cleaning up the mess it made.  I am also not convinced that this labor really helps the environment since none of the grains I was able to buy are local.

The point is I was trying to do something because I thought I should or because maybe I thought it was something to be  proud of.  My ego wanted to bake bread several times a week so I could feel like I had some control over my time and my food.  And then I had a moment of clarity where I said…

“Get over yourself!”

In my attempt to be “authentic” I was actually being pretty fake.  I wasn’t enjoying the project.  I was resenting it.  That is a tremendous waste of time and energy better spent on other things. 

Somethings just have to get done and some of them are less than glamorous. Somethings cannot be avoided and shortcuts are not always available but ask yourself…

Are there things in my life I do just because I think I should to be a good wife, husband, mother, co-worker, boss, or leader?  

Is that working for me? 

If so, then hooray for you.  If not, then you may want to have an honest discussion with yourself (and in my case with my bread) and decide how you really want to spend your time.  Decide where you can really make the most difference while still being happy and having fun.

When I retire to Tuscany to write and grow organic herbs, then I may revisit my relationship with bread baking.  For now I give up.  I’ll leave it to the professionals.

Now if I can just master cheesemaking…

Of course we’re talking about different kinds of music for each occasion.

Lest you be thinking that this only works on babies, I have seen it work wonders for adults as well.  Music can make or break any event.  I was at a networking meeting last night and everyone was very quiet.  It was the annual potluck for this group so someone brought some music to play.  As soon as the music started, people started to loosen up.  On the other hand, I was at a party this weekend where the music was very soft and mellow.  People seemed to have a hard time interacting, and these people knew each other. 

I have a friend who has done research on the effect music has on everything from classroom performance to Schizophrenia.  I will spare you the research summary other than to say that music can do great things.  We’ve even installed various music channels in the hospital throughout Aurora’s system so patients can enjoy their stay just a bit more.  At one of our metro hospitals they even pipe music into the stair wells.  That’s a nice touch.

I would encourage you to run some wacky experiments this week.  Play different music while you are working and see if you perform better to Bach or Metallica (Results may vary).  Maybe you can play different types of music during dinner and see if the family argues less (or more).  My personal favorite is to put on loud dance music when I have to clean the house.  It makes dirty toilets less terrible.  There is even music out there that is designed to encourage relaxing brain waves.

Press that easy button and make life a little sweeter.

Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life.  ~Berthold Auerbach

It turns out that there is something to the idea of counting your blessings.  A recent study from York University (Mongrain & Sergeant, 2009) found that having people write out 5 things a day that they were grateful for, reduced depression and increased well-being.  This exercise was especially helpful for people who tended to be negative thinkers. 

So it seems that being grateful and optimistic are strongly linked and the good news (for all you pessimists) is that it can be learned.  This short practice helps you to flex your happy muscles (well that sounds a bit naughty).  Anyway, this is a lovely exercise for anyone who is struggling with depression or would just like to feel more joy. 

Today’s Mood Lifting Prescription:

Take your vitamin D, exercise, and write out 5 things you are happy about in your life (no matter how small). What a simple way to improve your mood. 

Growing up my family always ate dinner together.  We even took turns cooking for each other so my mom wouldn’t have to cook every night.  By 11 I had my own night to plan the evening meal.  That’s not to say that everything we ate together was particularly healthy and it usually wasn’t made from scratch or organic.   But we were nurtured by each other’s company and we knew the details of each other’s lives. 

There are many reasons to encourage families to eat dinner together.  Numerous studies point to the benefits for children.  Children who live in homes where the family eats dinner together the majority of the time are less likely to smoke, drink, do drugs, get depressed, develop eating disorders and consider suicide.  They are also more likely to do well in school, delay having sex, eat healthier foods and learn social graces.  It also seems that families who eat together regularly have less tension and more intimate conversation.

There are benefits for adults too.  This is a wonderful way to reconnect with your family and to know what challenges and joys your loved-ones are experiencing.   It is also a time to set aside stress and resentment from the day and to eat in a mindful way.   You are more likely to enjoy your meal, feel satisfied, and avoid later snacking. 

Even if you don’t have children or they have left home, and even if you live alone there is still value in making a ritual out of mealtime.  Turn off the TV.  Take your time and think of cooking as an opportunity for spiritual nourishment rather than just another chore. 

As the holidays approach, we set aside time for grand celebrations but every evening meal can be a small celebration of the many blessings that we experience throughout the day.  Every dinner provides time for you to nurture your family and yourself.  Give yourself the gift of the present moment and enjoy the harvest.